R.I.P. Here Lies Our Generation's Class

Today, walking down the hallway, something hit me so hard I nearly dropped my books to the floor. As I passed the kids with their pants down below their knees, the people throwing around cuss words like they were a beach balls, the less-than-private couples “walking” down the hall, the girls wearing outfits with holes and mismatched fabrics, the boys with their faces completely hidden behind a wall of unkempt hair, and the numerous other things that happen so often that I’ve grown oblivious to their presence, the thought finally hit me: Where in the world did our class go? So todays rant will be about class: grow some and read this to the end(;

Let’s start with the females shall we?

There was a time when women wore nothing but dresses and jewelry (now, don’t get me wrong. I like my bluejeans just as much as the next girl, and I have no plans on going back to wearing ankle length cotton dresses that resemble a couch that was shot, but I only mentioned the dress to make a point). Can someone, PLEASE, tell me how in the Sam Hill we went from elegant ball gowns with frills and fans to the little dental flosses that some of the girls I see try to get away with?! I mean, I’m not without blame (though compared to some of you, I should be a saint). I’ve had dress code violations before, but never to the extent of some of the things some people never think about twice. Here’s a little hint for you: IF YOU BEND OVER AND YOU FEEL A BREEZE, IT AIN’T CLASSY. (Keep in mind, saying “aint” was only used for comic relief and it is MOST DEFINITELY unclassy to use it day-to-day.) But enough about the clothes, I can tell some of you are hopeless on that part… Okay, I totally get natural beauty. Really, I think that every girl on the face of the planet has some in her (some more than others, obviously, but that’s not the point). But here’s the issue: when in public, people shouldn’t have to ask themselves whether or not you showered that morning. It’s a simple as that. If you have long hair, FIX IT. I don’t care what the heck you do with it, straighten it, wear it curly, put it into a NEAT pony-tail, it doesn’t matter. What DOES matter however, is that I shouldn’t be able to look at your hair and know that if I squeezed it hard enough, I’d have enough grease to fry up some french-fries. Really, that’s not attractive to anyone, and it shouldn’t be to you. That sums up the physicality parts of being a classy female, so now on to the actual class. Girls, who on the face of the planet thinks it’s dainty to spit? REALLY? If you are female and you are spitting loogies out of your mouth, I no longer consider us of the same gender. You have been exiled from being a female. I don’t care what your chromosomes say, I will not be associated with you. The same for being a “tease”. If you throw yourself at every guy like he’s the last life boat on the Titanic, not only are you pathetically desperate, you are so unclassy that even the angry trashcan man on Sesame Street is above you in the class category. Come on, show some self-respect ladies.

Gentleman, please stop laughing so hard at the ladies’ critiques: we wouldn’t want your saggy britches to slide off with the movement, now would we? There’s my biggest thing with the physical aspects of a classy man: a gentleman knows that no one wants to see his Spiderman boxers, so he pulls his pants up and act rights. The classy gentleman also dresses everyday in a CLEAN (let me stress this again: CLEAN. (umm and for our less than genius gentlemen in the audience, clean is not something that smells decent that you found in the bottom of your closet.)) shirt that fits him correctly, and a pair of pants/shorts that sit properly at his waist, void of all raggedy holes or stains. It’s not rugged and sexy: it’s trashy and it bears the strong resemblance to a hobo. Also, a gentleman’s hair is clean, combed, and, preferably, unobtrusive to the view of his face (but like I’ve always said, two out of three is better than none out of three). As far as the personality of a gentleman: he has three basic rules. They are: women deserve the best (i.e. opening doors, not swearing in front of them, paying for dinner, NOT PUNCHING HER IN THE ARM even if it’s “as a joke,” etc.), respect is everything (i.e. respecting elders, respecting himself, respecting family and religion, etc), and finally, honesty is always the best policy. A gentleman tries to tell the truth whenever possible and he looks out for those whom he cares. So here’s a novel idea, teenage boys of my generation: you want to be considered a man? START ACTING LIKE IT.

So here’s a little general recap:

Being Classy 101:

1.Manners Matter!

• DO NOT chew with your mouth open.
• DO NOT smack your gum like a camel.
• DO NOT curse in front of women, and ladies: just don’t do it.
• DO respect everyone, regardless of the person.
• DO say “please” and “thank you”
• DO apologize when accidentally bumping someone.

2. A first impression is the most important impression!

• DO NOT let your privates stop being private.
• DO NOT have skin showing in places it shouldn’t.
• DO NOT wear clothes that do not fit.

A. Gentlemen: keep your pants up and shirts fitting properly.

B. Ladies: keep your clothes loose enough to not be mistaken as a second skin. DO dress yourselves modestly, but still fashionably.

• DO try to remember that other people do have to look at you all day as well.
• DO remember that if your grandmamma wouldn’t approve, the Classy Checklist probably wouldn’t either.

3. Be a productive member of society!

• DO NOT partake in illegal activities. Believe it or not, jail time is NOT classy!
• DO NOT be lazy and wait for others to do your work.
• DO NOT drop out of high school (because, Mc Donald’s uniforms are not classy.
• DO go to school (see 3rd “do not” for reasoning).
• DO respect the traffic laws.
• DO “do” your part to help make society function properly.

Alright, well there you have it folks. There is no excuse now to act like a bunch of heathen children! Plus, now that you’ve all been educated in the arts of Class, you can help me spread the word!

Stay Classy!

-the original unreasonable teenager

INTRODUCTION TO THE
UNREASONABLE TEENAGER

You know what I hate? Introductions. I'm never quite sure what to say. I mean, how do you sum up yourself to someone? What do you include or what don't you include? Some people don't include enough, but me? I have always had the problem of saying too much. So this post is my very long, slightly rambling, introduction to you: my avid readers and the occasional glancer.
My name is Anna. I am fifteen living in Alabama, but contrary to a few posters, haha I do have indoor plumbing, and obviously, I can read. I know right? Who knew they gave the southerners an edjamacation? (; (say it outloud, if you didn't catch on). I live in a fairly industrialized part of the state, though you will never know where (take that pedos!) exactly, because in all honesty, it has nothing to do with me as a blogger/writer. I am originally from a real small town in Mississippi, but I've lived the majority of my life with my mother and brother here in the Heart of Dixie. I started this blog as a sophomore in High School for two reasons: (One), I like to talk and write. If it invovles any type of communication, really, I'll probably enjoy it. and (Two), I had a few people who read my facebook notes and suggested it. Some random things about me are that I have a huge, massive, completely idiotic, somewhat neurotic fear of bugs. Like pass-out-because-a-horse-fly-got-stuck-in-my-hair fear (btw, true story..). I am a dog person (I've got five) but I like cats (I have three). The only reason I have so many is becasuse I have a weakness for puppy eyes (just ask my ex boyfriends) so it's next to impossible for me to leave a stray once I've found it. I don't watch a lot of TV, but I read more than is healthy. (I have an ongoing blog right now about books worth reading if your interested in that). I want to be a child psychologist once I graduate (both high school and college smartellecks). My bucket list includes seeing the seven wonders, becoming a New York Times Best Selling Author, and changing someone's life for the better. I am a Christian, born and raised, but I've never treated anyone who believes differently than me, poorly because of it. I am a republican, moderately, but here is my beef: religion and politics are my grey areas. I won't say i wont ever blog about them, but I'll do my best to stay away. Discussions about those either lose fans or gain them for the wrong reasons: neither of which I'm interested in. I love bright colors, like yellow or aqua blue, and I think the rain is beautiful, but nothing puts me in a sadder mood. I like being up beat and making people smile, so I hope that's what you do when you read my blog.
Feel free to leave any comments anywhere, or to email me. I love hearing from yall! (And my fan photos always make me smile. I have three hanging up in my room as of now!)

Have a wonderful Day (err, Night if that applies),
and keep coming back.
-the original unreasonable teenager

It has been like over two months since I blogged and guess what I have to say about that: it's about time. haha, I'm not even going to pretend that I'm going to keep this going every week, (unless I suddenly grow like a jillion viewers *wink wink*) but I'll write when I have something to say, alrighty?

So seeing as I am a total book worm, I have decided on a new topic....*drum roll*

BOOKS WORTH THE TIME IT TAKES TO PULL THEM OFF THE SHELF!

(and some that aren't worth the energy it takes to read the title)

1. okay, lets just knick this in the bud immediately: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Breaking Dawn, & and whatever other phase of the moon I've forgotten: these books are VASTLY overrated. Yes, I have read each one, yes, I enjoyed reading them (for the most part, i mean, SPARKLING vampires? ....yeeeeeeah....) and yes I even read a few of them more than once but here's the deal: they're not the greatest books of all time, and the characters (or vampires/werewolves/pixies (cause we all know book number 5 is going to have them) for that matter) ARE NOT REAL. it is a book. a FICTIONAL book. and Stephenie Meyer is not the greatest author of all time. She's not even top 10, or top 100 if we want to get technical. Her writings are entertaining, yeah, but to compare them to the masterpieces like Nathaniel Hawthorne's Scarlet Letter or ANY work by Jane Austen is not only, insanity, but to me it is borderline perverse. I get that most teenagers don't like reading Shakespeare or Harper Lee or Jane Austen because (*cue whiney teenage voice*) "it's boring" or "it's confusing", but you have to see past the time barriers like the language or general character behaviors and look at the big picture: the way they write is beautiful. Nathaniel Hawthorne includes SO many images in such a way that it's almost lyrical, and Shakespeare was a such a genius that he was able to tell entire stories in a particular scheme (iiambic pentameter if you want to get picky). So here's the basic breakdown: Stephenie Meyer deserves to be recognized for her accomplishing the near impossible: getting teenagers interested in reading...and maybe to be recognized for a some-what captivating plot....BUT THAT'S IT. *if anyone else throws out the words "Pullitzer Prize" I am going to gauge my own eyes out with a hot, salty spoon.*

ummm.... so Now, where were we? .... (;

2. Fire by Kristin Cashore. Okay, seriously, Cashore is one of my favorite present-day authors. She's relatively new to the publishing thing, (this is like her second book) but she's absolutely brilliant when it comes to writing a captivating story. Fire is a story about a girl who is so absolutely beautiful (she's not exaclty human *wink wink*) that she has men, like king,s wanting to marry her seconds after seeing her, but she has to do all these crazy tasks like in war and not to mention doing insane things to protect herself from her pursuers. I'm not doing the book justice, really, becuase it's a FABULOUS book with just the right dosage of love story and action. Seriously, it has tear jerking so-beautiful-you-want-to-die moments and then intense battle scenes full of death and gore (but not disgustingly so). It's a "companion" to Cashore's first story Graceling (which is also a REALLY great love story with just enough action), which means the two stories BARELY relate. I didn't like the idea at first, but believe me, Cashore know's what she's doing. I recommend, though, reading Fire before Graceling because it preceeds the Graceling plot line by a few years. I didn't read it that way and i still understood, but hey, its just a suggestion(:

2. The Inheritance Cycle by Christopher Paolini. So far, his first three books (he's kind of my hero because he wrote Eragon when he was FIFTEEN and it's near perfection) have been some of the best books I've read. If you're kind of a fantasy-buff but then again not like full blown Lord of the Rings (no offense to J.R. Tolkein, may he rest in peace) Star Wars stuff, I would deffinitely recommend these books. They have a little bit of everything: love, war, adventure, elves, dragons, suspense, and literally any aspect of the awesomest fairytale you've ever heard of. Plus the main character is young, about sixteen, so he (yes, he's a he. I usually don't connect well with male main characters but Paolini does a great job at making the gender not an issue) deals with a lot of stuff we (teenage america *woohoo, fight the power!*) deal with. My only complaint is that Paolini writes so dagum slow! Haha i guess perfection takes time, though right?

3. The House of Night Series by Kristen and P.C. Cast. Now because of Twilight, I can't mention the word "vampire" without everyone making preconcieved notions about what they think it's about. Well for your information, this series was written BEFORE twilight, so HAH! anywayyysss....this is a series with a lot of volumes, like I think they're at about 7 now. I won't lie: i didn't like the books at first. The Cast's have an interesting style of writing that is almost like speaking, and at times they can be a wee bit cliche but for the most part, they're pretty entertaining. The series is about a vampire fledging who has like super powers (not really) names Zoey who is chosen by the vampire Goddess Nyx (it is fiction people) to defeat this fallen angel guy who zoey was created to love. Blah blah blah, long story short: they're a bunch of quick-read highly entertaining and amusing books that often times end in very surprising ways...highly recommended for when you have to do ccross-country car rides. (:

4. The Mortal Instruments Trilogy by Cassandra Clare. For all of you athiests/nonchristians out there let this be a warning: THIS IS A CHRISTIAN SERIES. BUT, all the same, it's not even as religious as the Chronicals of Narnia books (which are also highly recommended). Now, heres the deal: there is an epically mahor plot twist at the end of the first one that made me put the series down, pout about it lividly for a few weeks, go so far as to give dirty glances at the cover, and mumble under my breath obscenitities every time i saw it. That being said, let me tell you that the plot twise GETS BETTER. do not be like me! don't wait months after reading the first because you are so angry. if you continue the series, everything works out in the end *wink, wink*. They're very well written and a decently original plot. Part love story part sci fi, the series is worth the time to pick it up (or press a button for all you Amazon people).

***oh, and they're about to make a movie about that one, looks pretty good if you ask me(:

5. Dear John by Nicholas Sparks. This is one of my friend's favorite books of all time, and after reading it, I'd say it was decent. If you love heart breaking love stories that will really leave a lasting impression on you: any book by Sparks is right up your alley (he wrote The Notebook and A Walk to Remember if those stand out to you.) It follows the story of two teenagers who fall madly in love until the boy is deployed to Iraq. "Dear John" refers to the letters they continuously right back and forth throughout his tour.

The book was well written and easy to understand, true to Sparks' nature, but my thing with him is this: every one of his NUMEROUS books (seriously, the guy's got like a jillion (and sadly, i've read almost all of them)) follows nearly the SAME plot line. He has yet to surprise me. Break my heart? yes. Bring me to tears? yes. Write something i didn't predict happening? No. It's a good book if you aren't picky and need a good love story, but other than that, you may just want to read it because the movie is coming out soon and it looks really good. (but then again, anything with Channing Tatum looks good, right? that boy is yummyyy(;)
Click here for the Trailer!

6. The Uglies Series by Scott Westerfield. So I have mixed feelings about this series because he had such a great thing going until he wrote the fourth installment in the series, The Extras. The three that are worth your time are: The Uglies, The Pretties, and The Specials. The series basically follows a girl named Tally in a world (I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be like the future) where once you reach 16, you have an operation that turns you into basically the most beautiful person imaginable. But with this operation, there is rumors that they might change your mind too. Throughout the three books Tally continuously overcomes everything she's not supposed to be able to while living in a world obsessed with beauty. Its got a lot of different stuff: sci-fi, the occasional love scene, but the majority of it is just mystery crossed with action. The reasonI hate the last one so much is because Westerfield pulled a lets-change-all-the-characters-but-keep-it-apart-of-a-series book, but unlike Cashore, he sucked at it, so the last one was just a random installment not even worth the time it takes to utter the title. (:


7. Percy Jackson and The Olympains Series by Rick Riordan. So this series started out as a school assighnment (I really do realize the shock in there) for me, but I ended up REALLY liking it because (1) it's an uber easy read and (2) I'm a closet mythology buff and this has just enough action to be a good mythology story. I think they're up to five books, and seriously, Riordan is one of those few gifted authors who have the ability to make sequals just as good as the original. I won't lie: it is a young reader's choice, and at times i have to roll my eyes from the naivety of the characters, but for the most part, its very readable. Now I have a confession: I haven't had the opportunity to read the finale in the series (I think it came out in about August?) but I have every intention to do so! I just have been a little busy lately (I'll get back to why in another blog). The movie coming out for this one looks REALLY good too. I'll post the trailor for those of you who are interested(:
Click here for the Trailer!

So This is my list as of now. I'm going to be periodically coming back to this entry and adding things as I read them, or as you guys keep sending me recommendations! I got one the other day for the Harry Potter Series, and I swear I am gunna read them, I just want to finish the movie series to end first! haha (yes, i am a TOTAL Harry Potter movie buff).

Keep sending in your comments and emails! I really love getting them! (my contact info is under my picture(;) Thanks for reading!
-the original unreasonable teenager